As Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer prepares to announce Windows 7, CIO.com considers what we'd really like to hear him say at the glitzy New York debut. And remember, "PC guys": This is all in good fun.n Microsoft will ship this little operating system called Windows 7 tomorrow, as you may have heard. We here at CIO.com have been writing about Windows 7 for more than a year. Microsoft has trickled out the details for months and IT veterans have sweated all of them, because history teaches us that OS upgrades go about as smoothly as a Kanye West appearance at an awards show.After months of Windows 7 hype, Ballmer’s big moment Steve Ballmer, Microsoft CEOAll that’s left now is for the bald guy to sing. Maybe he won’t sing, but as the big day approaches, we have some colorful ideas that Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer could use to add a hint of drama to the launch event. Here’s our Top 10 list of quotes that we’d love to hear from Ballmer—but surely won’t—tomorrow in New York City at the Windows 7 launch: 1. “True, Vista was our Hurricane Katrina, but we’ve got FEMA on standby for Windows 7.” 2. “Windows 7’s features will make your company fly faster than Balloon Boy!” 3. “There is absolutely no truth to the rumor that Windows 7’s improvements are a hoax made up for reality TV.” 4. “Tune in tonight for our breakthrough TV series Jon and Kate Get You Ready for Windows 8!“ 5. “We’ve scaled back those aggravating security prompts designed to prevent counterfeit copies. We just ask that you store all your personal information in our new cloud service, hosted by Google!” [ For complete coverage on Microsoft’s new Windows 7 operating system — including hands-on reviews, video tutorials and advice on enterprise rollouts — see CIO.com’s Windows 7 Bible. ]6. “Windows 7’s 3D Task Switcher has a secret ‘Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs Mode!’ Enable it and let the food fly—but no cream pies aimed at Mr. Gates, please!” 7. “Participate in our black turtleneck recycling program and get an extra $10 off Windows 7!” 8. “Yes, I am going as Mac guy for Halloween. How did you hack my PC and find that out?!” 9. “Baldness? I’ve got a cap for that!” 10. “Oh, and one more thing. I just love this new iPhone of mine!” Follow me on Twitter @lmclaughlin. Follow everything from CIO.com on Twitter @CIOonline. Related content brandpost Sponsored by SAP What goes well with Viña Concha y Toro wines? Meat, fish, poultry, and SAP Viña Concha y Toro, a wine producer that distributes to more than 140 countries worldwide, paired its operation with the SAP Business Technology Platform to enhance its operation and product. By Tom Caldecott, SAP Contributor Dec 04, 2023 4 mins Digital Transformation brandpost Sponsored by Azul How to maximize ROI by choosing the right Java partner for your organization Choosing the right Java provider is a critical decision that can have a significant impact on your organization’s success. By asking the right questions and considering the total cost of ownership, you can ensure that you choose the best Java p By Scott Sellers Dec 04, 2023 5 mins Application Management brandpost Sponsored by DataStax Ask yourself: How can genAI put your content to work? Generative AI applications can readily be built against the documents, emails, meeting transcripts, and other content that knowledge workers produce as a matter of course. By Bryan Kirschner Dec 04, 2023 5 mins Machine Learning Artificial Intelligence feature The CIO’s new role: Orchestrator-in-chief CIOs have unique insight into everything that happens in a company. Some are using that insight to take on a more strategic role. By Minda Zetlin Dec 04, 2023 12 mins CIO C-Suite Business IT Alignment Podcasts Videos Resources Events SUBSCRIBE TO OUR NEWSLETTER From our editors straight to your inbox Get started by entering your email address below. Please enter a valid email address Subscribe