by David Rosenbaum

A Prayer to Google

Nov 01, 20072 mins
IT Leadership

Google is my shepherd,

I shall not want

for page views and ad revenues.

It helpeth me find what I seek

and leadeth me through the Internet

and maketh me pots of money.

Lo, though I walk through the Valley of Spam

and malware and bots and zombies

I shall not fear

for Google is mighty.

Listen, Google, to my plea:

See my content,

for if Thou seest it not,

it remaineth invisible

and my traffic will

falter and fall and my business model will fail.

Oh, mighty Google,

first among search engines,

before who all others are as

Thy algorithms are

unknowable, fearsome and mysterious.

Your servers are legion, as numerous

as the stars in the sky.

Your gigabytes are uncountable,

your computing power


We are as nothing before you

and without you, we are


Mighty, magnificent Google,

See our poor, humble Web site

and lead the multitudes to it.

Rank us high, great Google,

and we will bring you offerings of

keywords and search optimized headlines.

Turn your face from our competitors

and banish them to the outer regions of the Web

where there is much weeping and wailing and

venture capital swirling down the drain.

See us Google, and we will

dwell in your servers forever and a day

(or at least until our next quarter).